How to Avoid Self-Doubt

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Love Yourself, First

I recently wrote an article for That Darlin’ Marie about body positivity. I talked about how I believe loving yourself is, ultimately, a choice. I stand by that! It’s entirely necessary to decide to love yourself and follow through.

That being said, I appreciate that the road to self love is bumpy and riddled with dead ends and potholes. It is for me, too. I thought about how I build myself up when I am feeling down and compiled another list for you lovely readers!

Here’s what I came up with:

  • Surround Yourself in Fierce Women
  • Develop a Self-Care Routine
  • Rock Some Sexy Lingerie
  • Ditch the Scale


Everyone has days where they doubt how great they are and it is a real bummer! Want to learn about how to avoid that and get your bad ass back?


Surround Yourself in Fierce Women

A female wolfpack is freakin’ dope. Enough said! Having a group of ladies (or even just one great one!) that support you 100% and love you unconditionally is a wonderful way to say adios to self-doubt. I mean, I would accept an invite to Taylor Swift’s band of damn beautiful girly friends every day of the week.

“All I can tell you today is what I have learned. What I have discovered as a person in this world. And that is this: you can’t do it alone. As you navigate through the rest of your life, be open to collaboration. Other people and other people’s ideas are often better than your own. Find a group of people who challenge and inspire you, spend a lot time with them, and it will change your life.” – Amy Poehler

Making friends as an adult can be challenging but it absolutely can be done. You may be nervous and uncomfortable at the thought, but you should really do what you can to get involved in something in your community! I met most of my wolfpack through the awesome community of youth ministry leaders in my hometown.


Develop a Self Care Routine

One reason you may be slipping into a self-doubt coma is because you have gotten too busy and forgotten to take care of yourself. It happens to the best of us. But having a routine to fall back on is a wonderful way to spend at least a little time, most days, loving yourself. If you currently have none at all (Truth: I’ve fallen FAR off of mine for FAR too long now), I would suggest starting small. For me, that is making my bed every day and going on walks in the morning before work.

If you are looking for suggestions on some habits to develop to put some “me time” into your days, check out these super informative posts!


plus size valentine's day lingerie

Rock Some Sexy Lingerie

Want to really get rid of self-doubt? Stand in front of someone in a sexy lace number and watch their jaw drop. (Probably should make that someone a person who regularly sees you naked…)

If you can stand, vulnerably, in front of a mirror and love yourself in lingerie – you are going to struggle to feel negatively about yourself. It may be challenging at first to take the leap and put some on but it will be so liberating when you realize how bangin’ you are!

If you are plus size like I am and want a great place to buy some lingerie, you should check out Hips & Curves! Their site is awesome and they have outfits made specifically to flatter our curves. Is there anything better than shopping somewhere you know will have your size?!


Ditch the Scale

I think a lot of body confidence issues are caused by numbers on the scale? But why? They don’t matter! You should love your body how it is, regardless of those pesky 7 pounds you are always gaining and losing at a whim. If you could just stop looking at your weight all together, perhaps the self-doubt that rides in on a raincloud when your weight goes up a pound would keep on blowing away.

Your health is important and I am not implying you should not think about it at all. Make healthy choices and exercise regularly as part of that self-care routine if you think that losing weight is important for you. But don’t get so addicted to weighing yourself that you actually weigh yourself down! The loop of self-hate that comes from obsessing over your weight is ugly and should be avoided at all costs!



I hope you can wave your insecurities goodbye, one by one. I hope you can pick yourself up from the bootstraps on your bad days and see the bad ass that you are in the mirror. You are smart, sexy, and wonderful. Live it!

If you want to check out that article I wrote about my own journey to body positivity you can do so here. Thanks for the support! 




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  1. Great points! I ditched the scale last year, and have not looked back. If I cannot love my body by looking in the mirror, I definitely do not need a scale reminding me of it. The only time I know how much I weigh now is when I visit the doctor’s office, which is not but maybe once a year. I tell them it is all lies anyways, because we all know the doctor’s scale adds at least 5 lbs! haha! Looking forward to more posts from you!

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